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Archive for the ‘demands’ Category

If you put your energy around what you want, that’s what you’ll get.
One client told me that she had been ambivalent about all of the questions her dad had about her dissertation.  But she decided to make a positive out of the parental interest.  She saw that her dissertation could be a bridge in her [...]

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Writing a dissertation brings with it many hard choices.  Often those hard choices directly impact relationships. 
One dissertation client told his parents that he can’t talk about his dissertation with them—not when it’s going well and not when he’s stuck—because he feels that it opens him to too much scrutiny.
But he’s always ill at ease around [...]

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Several ABD’s have told me over the last few days about issues with parents, spouses, boyfriends or girlfriends, and even friends.
The boyfriend of one of my clients has made it clear that he thinks it’s taking far too long for her to finish her dissertation.  And the process drags on because she hesitates to work [...]

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Family and friends tend to give advice to ABD’s.  It’s usually well-meaning.  Sometimes it comes from personal experience and sometimes not. 
Rarely does it help.
What I often hear from my dissertation clients is how difficult it is for them to deal with family members’ over-investment in the dissertation process. 
Most ABD’s say that their family or others [...]

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Dissertation writers occasionally come to an impasse, unsure of which way to go next.  You’ve probably been in this position.  You want to move forward, but it may seem prudent to wait—wait to see what your committee chair or mentor says, wait until you have a lot more time to read or go through your [...]

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When I was writing my dissertation, I tried my best to let go of all that was unimportant. 
I always wanted more time to be with my kids and to do that I had to let go of all but the essential aspects of my teaching. I wasn’t perfect. Even though I tried to compartmentalize, class [...]

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Last week three different dissertation coaching clients came to their calls with me frustrated.
One started the call by saying she felt “crappy.”  Another was also clearly cranky.
What had happened?  Each of them had had their writing time appropriated. 
One client, the father of a 7-month-old, was exhausted as well as cranky.  He had been up with [...]

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